Acceptance

Today, the universe wanted to teach me a valuable lesson.

This morning I started on a new chapter in my yoga book and the chapter is called "Acceptance" A little excerpt from it: (sorry its long, but it explains the whole chapter really well)

 "Temporary despair might result from the realization that even the aspects of your life  you love dearly will someday change. This feeling will pass quickly if you let it. Cars break, houses burn, people change, pets die, you'll lose your body eventually, and the only element that remains the same is your awareness of this change. Any effort you make to cling is pointless, like spitting in the wind. Despair can dissolve, resulting in an entire re orchestration of your energy, revealing abundant power and freedom, if you ride it to its natural conclusion. 

When you start coming from acceptance rather than the stand, chronic state of resistance, nonacceptance, your experience of life can't be stopped from totally changing for the better. 

Happiness is a function of acceptance." 

Of course, I thought RIGHT ON and I went about my day. Until tonight, I had 2 chances to deal with acceptance. Acceptance to my failed attempts at baking, ha! 

This weekend my running club is organizing a half marathon and 10k race. And afterward, a BBQ. I thought I'd do a good deed by baking up some vegan brownies for a nice contribution. 

So I got started. I've made these brownies before and they turned out alright, but a little on the oily side so I experimented and used less oil. The brownies tasted DELICIOUS, but one very important problem was that they STUCK to the pan. Crumbly brownies are not very appealing or portable to bring to a BBQ.  Failed attempt #1! 

Darn it, who was I kidding eh? I'm not a baker, never was, and probably never will be. 

But no, I wasn't going to give up. I told myself positive things and it worked! I went back into the kitchen. 

A little low on cocoa powder, I decided to use a recipe that calls for less cocoa.

Crazy Cake should be perfect! Even the instructions say its a never fail cake. 

All was going well, I had the perfect amount of cocoa powder left and I felt good I didn't give up on baking. The cake was finally finished after a patient 40mins in the oven. mmmm, house smelling deliciously like chocolate! As I was taking the cake out of the oven, you won't believe what happened! The cake fell PLOP upside down on the floor! I should have used 2 hands to take the cooking rack out or have just taken the cake pan out. The cooking rack was slippery and the cake pan slid right off of it as I was transferring it out of the oven. 

I stood there in disbelief! Half of me wanted to laugh at how ironic the situation was (I even thought I'd grab my camera) and the other side of me was screaming in frustration. After I finally came to my senses and started to worry that the hot cake and pan might discolor my kitchen floor, I scooped up the mess of a cake. 

Failed attempt #2! 

I think what kills me the most is that the cake was done! argh, still having a had time trying to accept my clumsiness! Obviously, this happened for a reason. I need to let go, take a deep breath, and laugh at the situation. Now that I'm typing this, I do find it quite humorous. I'm for sure not going to attempt to bake another cake tonight, but perhaps tomorrow. I do need to replenish my cocoa supply after all.  Oh well, life goes on. And I learned that the cooking rack can stay in the oven next time or use 2 hands! 

Some good news though, I did make some fabulous raw chocolate chip cookies last Saturday that even Motozo enjoyed and insisted I leave a few for him. He knows me too well! I would eat the whole thing if he didn't let me know he liked them.

These were so delicious! Probably the best tasting cookies I've ever had! So easy to make too. I followed a the recipe from here with some adjustments. 

What I used: cashews, oats, agave nectar, vanilla extract, coconut oil, shredded coconuts, and carob chips. 

This was my first time to use coconut oil and OH MY OH MY, I'm in love! This cookie had a real buttery soft texture and tasted divine! Carob chips, which I've grown quite fond of, were a great little add in. Funny how my taste buds have changed. I remember the first time I ate carob chips I thought they were horrible. Carob chips are quite different from chocolate, but in my opinion, better! I'm bias though because I can't have regular chocolate.

The coconut oil hardens the cookies up really well. :)

Lilia, do you and Maxim eat cashews? I remember you were saying you avoid it. But I was thinking, this is totally something I want to make for you guys when we visit! It's to die for! 

So, there we have it. Some good and some bad. In the end, it doesn't really matter all that much does it? 

Ah, this blog is so therapeutic. I almost forgot about my upside down cake that's still sitting on my kitchen counter. Its time for me to make peace with it and throw it in the trash.